The Friend You Keep Meaning to Call

There's a friend you keep meaning to call.

You know the one. You drafted a text three months ago and never sent it. You thought next weekend and then it was Tuesday and the energy was wrong. I'll do it when I have something to report, you said, but the thing you wanted to report is that you miss them, which is awkward to lead with.

So you didn't.

Here is what I want to tell you about that.

The friend you are not calling is also not calling you. They have the same draft, the same Tuesday energy, the same I'll wait until I have something to report. You are both waiting for the other one to break first. You will both die before that happens, because waiting has been beating calling for two and a half million years and the score is not getting closer.

So.

Send the text. The bad one. The one that says been thinking about you, no news, just thinking. Send it now. The friend will not reply for forty-eight hours, and will reply with I was about to text you.

You will laugh and feel ridiculous.

The ridiculous is the friendship. The friendship is what was waiting under the waiting.

— Linn